Voices of Courage

I am 100% against abuse of any kind - sexual, physical, emotional, animal, neglect, etc. I feel a little helpless at times in what I can do about it. I can't stop rapists. I can't intervene in domestic violence disputes. But I can raise awareness. And that is what my post here is for. Voices of Courage is an anti-abuse campaign sponsored by the BYU Womean's Services and Resources. Check out their blog - it has great information about an array of topics including abuse, self esteem, body image, emotional health, physical health, healthy relationships and much, much more. They are my inspiration for this post as well.

Basically today I want to share some things that are not okay for a partner in a relationship to do.
Your partner should not:
* cause you physical pain
* use force (physical or psychological) to make you engage in any sexual activity
* constantly criticize you
* call you names
* require your constant attention
* consistently talk bad about you or tell embarrassing stories about you to others
* hold you personally responsible for his/her happiness
* control what you do and who it is with
* disregards your feelings

There are many, many, many more things I can add to this list. To see a much more extensive list of warning signs of abuse (specifically emotional abuse - since that is usually the hardest to detect) please read more here.

I have been reading a book recently where one of the characters is married to a very abusive man. The wife stays with her husband because of her commitment to marriage and her personal beliefs that divorce is wrong. I want to say: No one should have to continue to stay in an abusive relationship. Divorce is an option for anyone being abused by their partner. If you are in an abusive relationship, it is in your best interest to get out of it - even if that means divorce. Please don't stay with an abuser to "save a marriage." You are more important than a marriage.